My Inspiration

My Inspiration

Sunday, 10 July 2011

Another mummy quandry.

Just a note, this post is going to come out pretty rambly, unstructured, and boring to those of you without kids. Sorry.

I am so confused about food and my baby.

For the last week I have been feeling like Baby Aislynn is ready to progress from just breast feeding and onto some food. She is staring at us when we eat, trying to grab off my plate, and putting more and more things into her mouth. I've brought it up a few times with Cuinn, but not seriously enough to have a long discussion about it. I've done my research. Before Aislynn came along I had planned on doing BLW (baby led weaning). I just felt that it would be like an extension of breastfeeding. Allowing Aislynn to have a lot of control over what she's eating and allowing her to eat naturally. I found this site very helpful in giving me the low down on BLW. I still need to get my doctor's opinion. Our next appointment is on the 29th. I hate having to wait.

On the other hand, I can give her some rice cereal NOW and I don't have to wait until 6 months. Which is 2 months away! Also, the nurse at one of my mommy groups told me that giving the baby rice cereal is fine. And that for some babies it is a good start to get them going on working their mouth on something other than milk or formula.

Through my research though, I'm finding that there is next to no actual nutrients or benefits to giving her rice cereal. The only real good part of it is the breast milk. Which she is already getting from me when she eats. So is it really necessary to give her "empty calories" through rice cereal? 

I don't know.

Cuinn keeps telling me that I should just go with my gut. But how do I go with my gut when it changes every day? I mean, I really do think I am leaning more towards forgoing the whole rice cereal thing and go back to my original plan of BLW. On the other hand though...

I have been fighting these thoughts over and over in my head for the last week. Well, if I'm going to be honest, since she was born. I don't know why, but the food issue has been on my mind since I was pregnant. I don't know why, but my mind always fixates on one thing and I just can't shake it. The last 6 months, it's all about baby's food.

Since in the last week I've been really thinking about the rice cereal I felt a little weird when, at church today, my new friend C and her husband S told us that they just started their daughter N on rice cereal yesterday! Their daughter was born a couple weeks before Aislynn so is roughly the same age as her. 

Now, I know. I'm not supposed to compete with other moms. I KNOW. All babies do things at different times. I KNOW. What's right for one baby is not necessarily right for another. I KNOW.

But honestly? I felt so upset that N is on rice cereal and I haven't started with Aislynn yet. I felt like I was behind. I felt like I needed to catch up.

So I went out and bought some rice cereal. 

And I'm beginning to think it was a mistake.

I just. I dunno. I really hate being the mum sometimes, y'know? I hate that I have the final say. I know that a lot of people are really glad that they have the final word and what they say goes, but for me it's just stressful! I want to make the right decision, and I hate having to make the final decision. Because what if I'm wrong? No one is there to tell me that I made the absolute right decision or the absolute wrong decision. Yes, there are tone of people on both sides giving me their opinions, but in the end they always say, "But you're the mum and ultimately it's YOUR decision. Do what YOU feel is right."

The thing is...


I'm new at this. Would you ask the person at your job who had only been working there for four months what to do? No, you would ask the more experienced person. They would know what to do. The newbie would have no idea.

So why are you making me decide?

Anyway, after writing this blog, which has taken me about an hour, I think I am going to go with BLW. I think I am going to hold off on the rice cereal.

I have a doctor's appointment on the 29th. Maybe I'll talk to him and see what he thinks. Either way I look at it I lose though. I'm wrong if I give her rice cereal and I'm wrong if I do BLW.

GAH, I'm too much of a perfectionist for mothering sometimes. I just wish I had one option. The only right option. So that I knew for certain what I was doing was right. Especially when it comes to my daughter. 

I know I'm probably going to regret asking this, but what do you, my lovely readers and follows, think? Should I wait until 6 months and do BLW? Should I just give in and give her some rice cereal? What do you do and why did you choose that? Do you have any good references? Thanks! 


Sapphire_Angel said...

To try and help here, i started my little lady on rice cereal right before 4 months, and got in a lot of trouble with the health nurse about it, however she has never had any eating issues and is 10 months now and refuses all baby food and only wants her bottles of milk and our food. The guild lines change constantly on what you are supposed to do, so truly go with your gut. If you think that Aislynn needs more food, nice cereal may be empty calories for the most part, but the carbs are good for energy and a growing girl needs them. They are also super low on the allergen risk scale and are a good place to start. The reference that I use the most is I have found the the recipes are fast, easy and healthy, but they also give a well rounded opinion on feeding babies. Also if you are worried about empty calories, you could make your own rice cereal with whole grain or brown rice. I hope that helps

pippasmum said...

Just a warning, BLW totally freaks out more health care providers, at least in Canada. They haven't heard of it but from what I have been told, it is much more common in Britain and many midwives and health visitors there are fine with it. Just a warning, rice cereal can cause BIG TIME constipation, too (for my kids, anything that is iron fortified, like cheerios, etc., caused problems but foods with naturally occurring iron were fine). It's all totally dependent on the child and that's the hard part - there are no firm answers. What works for one child may not be right for yours.
If you have read back in my blog, you will know that the whole food thing really stressed me out, too. I started both kids at 6 months (I didn't really feel the rush to start solids) and both my kids refused any kind of purees or cereals (which also isn't uncommon). They wanted to feed themselves. BLW worked for our family and in some ways, made life easier. It was also a complication because I had to start them on meat really early because I didn't give them iron-fortified cereal. If you want to start solids now, I think you can also give really mashed banana or avocado - they are great starting foods.
Just remember, as one of my favourite parenting experts says, at 15, all children eat, sleep and use the toilet... those things all stress us out so much in the beginning and they always work themselves out. Hugs to you, I remember the fear.
p.s., I bought the BLW book when Baby Bean was about 5 months old and it really put my mind at rest. Would you like me to bring it when we see you on Thursday?

pippasmum said...

I'm back. I hope I didn't seem flip with my comment about beings being better by the time they are 15. I worried that it might seem insensitive but it really did help me to remember, when I was worried about food or potty training, that it would settle itself somehow. Before you know it, she will be eating like a trooper. Just remember, with breastfeeding her, you are giving her the BEST thing she could ever get. Until she is a bit older, any food she gets is just icing on the cake. And if there is one thing I know, you have great instincts as a mom and if you go with what feels right to you, it will be o.k.
If you haven't read it, here's my food struggle:

Just Another Mummy Blog said...

Thank you both for your comments.

Sarah, don't worry, your comment wasn't flip. I need to keep reminding myself that in 15 years, it's really NOT going to matter if I gave her rice cereal or solids. Thank you.:)

I would really like to read that book, if you wouldn't mind bringing it on Thursday?

So good to know that another mum freaked out about food. Misery likes company, or something like that.

Jenn said...

I did rice cereal at 5mos with my first, BLW with my second. I wish I had done BLW with my first, because it was SO much easier, but I did the whole cereal bit because that's what you're "supposed" to do. I've also been told that breast fed kids take better to BLW because they're already used to food flavours that they get through your milk. Try and go with your gut, and ignore what everyone else is what feels right for you!