My Inspiration

My Inspiration

Tuesday, 24 September 2013

A Fall Update...

 I do not know how blogger types with more than one kid have time to blog on the reg and also have their family's fed, looking cute and happy. Y'all must know of some secret I don't. Fill me in, guys!

I miss blogging. A lot. And I am going to make much more effort to be here more often. 

What's been going on? A little bit of everything. Cuinn is currently away in Vancouver. He had his yearly work conference, and he also went a couple days early to hang with his brother. His time with his family went well. He would call with a smile on his face, looking lighter than I've seen him in a long time. I think sometimes (all the time) my man doesn't like to admit to enjoying just being a younger brother. It was good for him to be able to just let loose, and do something fun, without having to worry about a toddler, a baby and a wife. 

Now he is at the conference part of his trip. Let's just say the lightness has disappeared slightly. I kinda wish his brother time had been at the end of his trip, so that he could come home all "young". I love seeing him like that, reminds me of the guy I dated.

Oh this post is starting to sound depressing. Just remember that he's also at a 5 star hotel, eating like a king, partying with Sony and Microsoft and getting to sleep in a big bed, all by himself with no toddler feet in his face and the smell of baby vomit on his overtired wife's shirt! We miss him like crazy, can't wait for him to come home, but we sure are glad he's getting a bit of a rest so when he gets back, this momma can go have a rest!

I saw this post on this chick's blog and I always love a quick and easy bloggity blog blog. So, enjoy!

Making : A baby blanket for a dear friend who is expecting a tiny little girl! 

Cooking : NOTHING! We have been food blessed the last few days with Cuinn being gone. I'm wondering how long I won't have to cook for!
Drinking : Water. Trying to flush out the caffeine induced migraine. 
Reading: Harry Potter series. It's been too long, and I'm in need of some comfort words.
Wanting: My husband home.
Looking: Into road trip tips with two toddlers for next summer.
Playing: Tea party. Every day with Aislynn. I love it.
Wasting: Time on Reddit and Pinterest.
Sewing: Envy. I have it bad. I really need to take my machine over to A.'s house to get that tutorial. 
Wishing: For a mini break.
Enjoying: The quiet.
Waiting: For my head to stop hurting.
Liking: The new granola and banana peanut butter. So delish.
Wondering: If my babies will sleep all night long tonight.
Loving: Grey's. I'm rewatching it from season 1 on Netflix. 
Hoping: For a later wake up call tomorrow.
Marveling: At how loud my clock ticks. Has it always been that loud or am I only just noticing it now?
Needing: A date night. Time by myself. A girls night. In that order. 
Smelling: Baby puke. Lorelei just woke up for a top up for the night, and now I need to change my shirt.
Wearing: Cuinn's pj bottoms. Because they are just way more comfy than mine.
Following: His direction.
Noticing: That my baby Aislynn is not such a baby anymore. 
Thinking: About all that needs to be accomplished this week.
Knowing: That I can do this. I. Can. Do. This.
Focusing: On my family. 
Bookmarking: Christmas idea's. 
Opening: My heart to hear what direction to take.
Giggling: About Aislynn copying my words to Lorelei at bedtime. "Goodnight Lorelei. Love you to the moon!"
Feeling: Filled with thoughts and emotions. I need to let some of them out. 

Thanks for stopping by!

Wednesday, 28 August 2013

A 50 Things Post...

It's been awhile. There's a few reasons why, and I'm working on a blog post to explain my absence soon. I am just having a hard time getting the words out. Thank you all for the emails though. I'll be back soon. :) 

So I've seen people posting this list of 50 things about them, and as you all know, I love an easy blog post. So I'm going to do it. BUT, for your added pleasure, I'm going to do an extra 30 things. 10 for Aislynn, 10 for Lorelei and 10 for my relationship with Cuinn. Giddy up! 

50 things you may not know about me:

1. I don't shower everyday. In fact, I rarely shower every other day. There are times when I only shower once in a week. I loathe showering. 

2. I don't like wearing socks, but I wear then all the time because...

3. ...I get an ingrown toenail on my big toe when I'm pregnant and I'm too scared to get the surgery on it again and I'm so self conscious about it. 

4. I'm pretty sure onions are the most vile thing on the planet. But I put onion powder in most of my cooking. 

5. Being a mom is so frustrating, exhausting, difficult and, at times, mind-numbingly boring. But I honestly am the happiest and most fulfilled I have ever been in my life. (Yea, I know it's cliche, but it's so true.)

6. More often than not, I would rather stay home in my sweatpants and watch a movie with Cuinn than go out. 

7. Ice cold milk is the best drink in the world. Any other temperature is the grossest.

8. Cereal is my favorite snack ever. 

9. I used to hate most things chocolate (except uk chocolate). Then I got pregnant with Lorelei. Now my favorite ice cream is chocolate peanut butter, and my go to treat is chocolate. 

10. Phone calls give me small anxiety attacks. I get sweaty, my pulse races, I can't think straight and my impulse is to quickly unplug the phone. I so much prefer emails. Or texting. 

11. I love polka dots. So much. 

12. The thought of my kids going to school and me having to get a job I know I'll hate, depresses me. 

13. I love Big Brother. And I love Amanda. She is going to win and then probably dump her nasty "fiancĂ©" UNLESS, he wins. Then she'll marry him for the money. Y'all can hate on her as much as you want. But she's (and other girls like her) the reason that Big Brother is still going strong 15 seasons later. 

14. When I was very young, I wrote a letter to the prime minister to ask him why everyone can't just have the same amount of money. Then there wouldn't be poor people and everyone would be happy. He wrote back and said, "that's sweet. But no." I still think it could work... 

15. Seeing Cirque in England with my mum was an experience I will never forget. I was so overcome with emotion it was embarrassing.

16. Every time I cross something off my bucket list, I need to cry. I think it's tears of happiness, whatever it is, it feels so good. 

17. I love to crochet. My friend and I even started a little home business, selling home made items. 

18. I miss my lip ring so much, I'm thinking about getting it redone. 

19. Roller coasters are the greatest invention of life. Carnival rides that are just circles are the worst. 

20. Harry Potter is my (not so) secret addiction. I have the biggest crush on Seamus. 

21. Parenthood is my tv addiction. Joel reminds me of Cuinn. Swoon. 

22. Gilmore Girls is still my most favorite show though. 

23. Although I rag on our tiny town quite often, I have never felt more at home or as a part of a community, as I do here. 

24. I'm totally one of those people who LOVE comic book movies. But have no desire to actually read the comics. The Avengers, X-Men, TDK, Spider-Man. Love them all. 

25. Laundry is the worst chore ever, but I love cleaning the bathroom. Seriously. I clean it every day and it makes me happy WHILE cleaning. 

26. I love dressing up. Unfortunately I never get the opportunity to do so. 

27. I sing in my churches worship team. And I LOVE it. A lot. 

28. Summer is the worst season ever. I wish it didn't exist. Even as a kid it stressed me out. 

29. When my brother and I were younger, he would always get me to ask our parents for things. So if we were in the car, and we passed a McDonald's, he would whisper, "Sarah. Ask mum and dad if we can go there for dinner." And I would. So I'm pretty sure the fact that I "always ask for things." Isn't really true, I just asked a hell of a lot more than I actually wanted. 

30. I drive standard. Cuinn and I will never not own a standard. I love it. You should learn if you don't already know how. 

31. Chuck e Cheese pizza is the best pizza I have ever eaten. No, really. It is. 

32. I have a hard time with left and right. 

33. When I was younger I would confuse white and yellow. 

34. I still do the hand trick for my 9 times table. 

35. When I was in 7th grade, I tried really hard to get the French award in school. (Person with the highest mark in French) all year long I studied so hard to win. Everyone thought I was going to get it. On the day the awards were announced, Melissa got the award instead. I was so crushed that I went home and cried. That was the moment I stopped trying so hard in school. I couldn't see the point in trying so hard and then "failing". I have never told anyone that before. 

36. Tulips are my favorite flower because they remind me of my mum.  

37. I sleep with the window open in the winter. It's marvelous. 

38. I hate when people ask my advice because I think, "how should I know? I don't know anything about anything!" (That's not nearly as self deprecating as it sounds)

39. If I could have any superpower I would want to be invisible. And I would totally be a vigilante. With a little villain thrown in for fun. 

40. I went fishing at the cottage this summer. Now, when both kids are crying, Cuinn is working both jobs, dinner is burning and none of my clothes fit. I close my eyes and pretend I'm in a boat on the lake. Fishing. 

41. Campfires soothe my soul. 

42. My favorite kind of alone day is curling up in my bed, a/c blasted, reading a really good book. 

43. I have come around to the idea of living out in the country. Please don't tell Cuinn. 

44. I really love earrings and necklaces but I rarely ever wear them. 

45. Bacon sandwiches are my favorite lunch but since I loathe making bacon, I never eat them. 

46. I am a pretty good cook and can make a pretty delicious pie. I make nearly one hundred squares at Christmas. All the holidays for the last three years have been my cooking, and me alone. I am a wizard in the kitchen. EXCEPT for breakfast. My pancakes are runny in the middle, eggs are either burnt or raw, I overlook bacon. I'm a hot mess when it comes to breakfast. Cuinn rocks breaky in our house. 

47. Going to bed at 9 pm excites me. Seriously. 

48. I play bass guitar. But it's a secret. 

49. I could walk around IKEA all day long and be perfectly content. 

50. Blankets are my favorite couch necessity. 

10 things you may not know about Ailsynn:

1. Her first apgar score when she was born was a measly 2. She was breathing. That was pretty much all she had going for her when they pulled her out. 

2. She loves to wear my shoes around the house while saying, "i'ma diva!" 

3. At bedtime, she wraps her arms around my neck and kisses me about a zillion times. It's awesome. 

4. She would much rather play with blocks or be outside than watch a show. 

5. She is "ready for the school bus" and can't wait to start school.

6. She has the carrier gene for CF. something she shares with her daddy. 

7. She is very protective of her baby sister and does not like strangers touching Lorelei. 

8. She loves to take my phone and "call boys." Mostly Calvin. Sometimes Sean. 

9. Her 3 most favorite things to do with mummy are helping in the kitchen, reading books and putting make up on. 

10. She doesn't wear a diaper anymore. She's a big girl! 

10 things you may not know about Lorelei:

1. She lights up as soon as Aislynn enters her vision. 

2. She loves to give big, open mouthed, sloppy kisses.

3. She's the cuddly one.

4. She can roll from her back to her front and then to her back again. 

5. She likes to hold onto daddy's hand while he is driving. 

6. She coos. Oh, she coos. 

7. She really loves bath time with her sister. 

8. She already needs a haircut. At 4 months. 

9. She is going to have abs of steel because she often lays on her tummy with her feet and arms in the air. Like a body surfer. 

10. Her smile is the sweetest thing I have ever seen. 

10 things you may not know about Cuinn and my relationship:

1. We met in a bar. But we usually tell people we met through mutual friends.

2. We were both dating other people when we met. Not for much longer though...

3. Cuinn moved to Ontario to be with me not long after we met. 

4. On our first date we went to see Pans Labyrinth. We thought it would be a nice, light hearted children's movie. It's not. At all. And it's subtitled.

5. I didn't actually think Cuinn liked me when we first met. I kept flirting with him and he didn't really respond. Which made me flirt even more. Turns out he was just nervous. 

6. There is a full foot difference between our height. For our wedding, I wore 6 inch heels for the ceremony so that our kiss wouldn't be so back breaking for him. 

7. One of us believes in soul mates. The other doesn't. 

8. Walking Dead is "our show". We can not watch the most recent episode unless we watch it together. Same with Modern Family. 

9. I said "I love you" first. Sort of. 

10. We can just look at each other, across a crowded room, and know what the other person needs. I love that. 

What's something about you that I may not know? 

Friday, 14 June 2013

A thankful Thursday...

So, it's been a while guys. 

I missed you.

But I really have a valid excuse this time

This gorgeous girl has been keeping me occupied!

I'd like you all to meet Lorelei Rayne Simpson. Born April 17 at 6:35 pm. 9 lbs 14 oz and 21.5 inches long. She has a big, beautiful head that is covered in hair. She's so stylish that it's naturally that new ombré look! I am so wonderfully smitten with my new baby girl.

So without further aideu, here is a Thankful Thursday post. Finally. I'm back. 

1. For friends who brought us food and flowers and gifts and hugs and visited me in the hospital and looked after Aislynn while I was in labor and have since taken her for walks or to the park or out for dinner so that I could get a bit of a break. Seriously. My friends. You are amazing. I love you all.

2. My family. Who sent flowers across an ocean, who came to visit from two provinces away, who love Lorelei as much as Cuinn and I do.

3. My Aislynn. My helper. The big sister. Lorelei's protector. I love that girl. And I love how much she loves her sister. It makes things so much easier having her love her sister. 

4. My Cuinn. My best friend. My partner. My husband. The father to my two gorgeous children. You've been such a rock star during this transition from a family of three to a family of four. I love ya, dude.

5. This wrap. Seriously. I have used this wrap more times with Lorelei in 2 months than I think I did in the whole time Aislynn used it. Aislynn liked it, but Lorelei LOVES it. She's pretty much in it 12 hours a day... 

6. Our church had their annual women's retreat a couple weeks ago. It was so amazing. I took Lorelei with me and she was always in somebody's arms. Plus, it's always wonderful getting to know women in your church who you might not talk to on a Sunday morning. Awesome. 

7. At said retreat, we made necklaces out of a washer and scrapbook paper. I made one for me and one for Aislynn. She has yet to take it off and gets mad if I'm not wearing mine too. She also pulls it out a few times a day and says, "matching mumma!" That always fills me with joy. 

8. Cuinn had a huge answer to prayer this morning. I'm not able to go into details right now, but suffice to say; God is good. All the time.

9. I know other people will have my head for this, but I am so glad the weather is not hot. I hate summer. Every year I dread the heat. Well this year? I'm still wearing pants. In June. I am ever so grateful for that. 

10. Not being pregnant anymore. Seriously. I did NOT enjoy this pregnancy, so I am so thankful it's over.

11. This apple/pear/rhubarb crisp. Best recipe I have made ever. Cuinn and I were shoveling it in like there was no tomorrow (or more fittingly, like there was no baby weight to lose)

12. Impromptu girls night. Only three of us could make it, but it ended up being one of the best nights out in a really long time. 

13. My seasons pass to the Elmvale Zoo. It's just a tiny little zoo about 40 minutes away, but Aislynn LOVES it. We even can feed giraffes and goats and monkeys and lemurs. It is such a great little zoo. Perfect size for a morning out with a two year old and a two month old. 

14. The stupid awesome double stroller that my friend K gave me. For free. I was so against getting one. But she offered it to us, and you can't say no to a free stroller. Well, let me tell you. I have been humbled and I love the double stroller. We'll pretty much only use it for days out to big places, but it's really fantastic that Aislynn can jump in and out when she's tired. And Lorelei fits nicely in her car seat in it. Well, when she's not in the wrap that is...

15. Back rubs. Cuinn, I'm looking at you sweets.

16. Parking on the street. We have a parking spot in our lot, but I really hate going up stairs to go down stairs (it's a weird set up), so I just park in the street and go in the door and I'm in my apartment. I might be annoying people, but hey, I've got two kids to lug in with 8 bags of groceries. I park where I want to park. 

17. BLT hot dip. Enough said.

18. Our tiny town now has a yarn store!  Store dedicated to just yarn! I can not tell you how pleased this makes me.

19. Getting $50 worth of kids books. For free. I traded in a whole shwack of my books a few months ago to a local book shop in town. She gave me quite a good deal on them and I have been using my credit slowly but surely over the last few months. Today, Aislynn and I went in and I let Aislynn pick as many books as she wanted (knowing that I still had about $140 worth of credit). She was in heaven. And we read all the books before bed tonight. All 9 of them. That kid. 

20. That Aislynn has my love of the written word. That means so much to me. Love it.

That's it for tonight. What are you thankful for? 

Sunday, 14 April 2013

A Point Or Two...

I am cranky.

I am tired.

I feel guilty for not blogging lately.

I am still pregnant. So here is my update on my life.

~ Yes. Still pregnant. My due date was April 9th, it is now nearly April 15th (in 58 minutes it will be), and I am still pregnant. 

~ It was our churches men's retreat this weekend. I kept telling Cuinn to "just go already!" because I knew he wanted to. And I knew the only reason he didn't go was because I might have gone into labor. I also knew that if he didn't go, by Murphy's Law, I would not go into labor. But if he had, this baby woulda come out in half an hour. I'm only slightly bitter that he remained at home...

~ I love cereal. A lot. Seriously. I have been going through 2 boxes a week during the last 10 months. Cereal, I love you.

~ One of my friends, who was due a week after me, had her baby on MY due date. Lisa, I hate you.

~ I don't really hate Lisa. I'm really happy for her. Her daughter is adorable and I am so excited to meet her. Congratulations again lady.

~ If any more of my friends have their kids before me though? I might go on a rampage. I really can't control what happens...

~ Hidetoshi Imura is friends with me on Facebook. He often "likes" my posts. You have NO idea how much this thrills me. 

~ When you don't read your blogs in about a month, you get really behind. And then you have to spend like... 3 hours trying to catch up. I wish all your bloggers would stop being so interesting and writing so much so that when I get back into the swing of things I don't have to read blogs for 3 or 4 hours. 

~ Please don't stop writing though. I really love your blogs. 

~ We got a new camera. Finally. Cuinn also got his "new to us" computer up and running WITH the webcam. You have no idea how much these two things excite me. The new camera because I can take pictures of my kid and share them with our far away families  and the webcam because Skype with my parents is so much better when they can actually see Aislynn and not just a bunch of pixels. I LOVE seeing the proud looks on their granparent faces. Seriously, fills my heart with joy.

~ We're in the last "chunk" before my parents come home. When my mum and dad left, my mum said, "If you break down the time in chunks in your head, it won't feel so long." So that's what I did. But, like pregnancy, that last little chunk is taking the longest to pass. 12(ish) weeks until they are home. 

~ Cuinn's parents are coming to visit at the end of the month. They have requested that there is actually a baby by the time they get here. Hey, no promises. I like to cook 'em for a while!

~ We have moved. Into our new place. I go through stages of really loving it, to really hating it. But mostly loving it. I think this is a good place for us right now.

~ Double strollers are dumb and I'm not getting one. 

~ I'm also not getting a mini van. No matter how many of our friends keep telling us how amazing they are. I do not believe you. I think you all have drank the kool aid and are just brain washed. 

~ I enjoy Creme Eggs. More than a normal person should...

~ I have nothing more to say right now. See ya in another month. I'll probably still be knocked up.

Sunday, 24 March 2013

A Fact or 5...

It's Sunday evening. My husband has been gone since yesterday and just got home. What's a good wife to do but send him right back out to get me a nice cold soda?

This chick is spoiled.

While I wait for the man to come home with my ice cold soda, I figured I'd link it up with some things you might be curious to know about me.

Who isn't curious to know more about me? I'm kinda a big deal... Aislynn.

5 Facts About Me...

1. I don't like that people can find me. Or know what I'm doing. Or know what/when I've read things. So I turned off that stalker thing on my iPhone so you don't know if I read your text. I read my Facebook messages through my email so you can't tell if I read it or not. I turned my location finder thing OFF on my phone so I'm not "checking in" on any social media thing. I have never named my tiny town on here. I just think it's weird that people can find me. All the time. I don't like it.

2. I put vinegar on everything. For reals.

3. I cut my juice with water, because straight juice is just too darn sweet. It hurts my teeth. And my juice lasts longer than yours. HA HA!

4. Jeans are more comfy than sweat pants. No pants are more comfy than jeans. Sweat pants are for watching a movie in, not going to Walmart in. Yoga pants are the same thing as sweat pants. You do not leave the house in sweat pants. This is law, according to the Simpson home.

5. I am more self conscious than I have ever been before, as a mother.

Linking it up with This Chick...

Thursday, 21 March 2013

A Thursday Full Of Thanks...

Yesterday I was miserable. Mis. Er. A. Ble. I was so cranky at the man from a stupid tiff on Tuesday night that wasn't resolved to my satisfaction. (Read, I lost.) My blood stealing appointment was "cancelled" without reason after i had fasted for 12 hours. Then asked if I could come back the next day. Well, I couldn't. Aislynn is in daycare WEDNESDAYS. Not THURSDAYS. The lack of packed boxes was stressing me out to the max. And my blood pressure was high at my midwives appointment. Well. High for me. Normal for a normal person. AND, I had eaten all my mini creme eggs and I had no chocolate in the house. Which, for pregnant Sarah, means someone might die.

Anyway, bottom line? I was really cranky.

Then Thursday came along. Aislynn came into our bed in the morning and rubbed my back and kissed me. Then she let Cuinn and I have a few extra cozy sleep moments before asking for cereal. Then we drove daddy to work and then we headed to Bible study. I have to say, I was a bit reluctant to go today, being so cranky and kinda not ready to let go of my crankyness. (You know how sometimes you're just not ready to get over it yet?) Well, I went anyway. Because I had told Aislynn she would get to play with her little friend "Naley" if she would just stop whining. She stopped whining immediately. And if there is one thing I learned about parenting from my parents it's, "You always keep your promises. No matter how big or small." So off we went to Bible study.

And that's when all my crankyness went away. And I was humbled again. 

So, my Thankful Thursday post is coming pretty easily today.

I'm Thankful for...

1. Our good friend K. Who took some amazing maternity shots of me last Thursday. To see the sneak peek, go here. We can't wait to see the rest! We are so blessed to have such talented friends!

2. Our good friend K, again, who is watching Aislynn for me tonight. Cuinn has class on Tuesday's and Thursday's. Usually I just bring Aislynn along and she can play with one of her friends, R. But I just know that today she won't be ok with that. So K is coming to our rescue. Thanks again, lady friend! I owe ya one. Or seven.

3. A reconciliation with a good friend. Again, we are so blessed by the people who love us here. I'm not going to go into too much detail, but a friend and I had a thing. And Tuesday afternoon and evening we hung out and had a heart to heart and I'm so relieved to be back on track with her. It had been weighing on me for far too long.

4. Aislynn's little friend, N. Those two girls. Sigh. Her parents and Cuinn and I really will have many a story to share about them as the years go by...

5. Girls night out with our fantastic group of girls. 6 more days until the next one!

6. Cuinn had his review today at work. Basically he was told he was a rock star. Which I already knew, but it's really great for him to hear that from his boss.

7. Cuinn is also getting an unexpected bonus. Which really, could not be coming at a better time.

8. Our birthday weekend away at Niagara. It may have been a couple weeks ago, but I haven't done one of these in a while. I'm so thankful that we were able to do that for Aislynn. 

9. How well my painted onsies for the new baby turned out. Seriously, it was so nice to do something creative again.

10. The small group prayer that we did during study this morning. What a refreshing time that was. 

11. Our new pastor and his family. I have gotten to know J a little bit in the last little while and it has been such a joy! 

12. There may be snow on the ground, but the sun is shining, and I can tell that spring is just busting to get here. 

13. Our good friends J and S, who I know I have mentioned before, are watching Aislynn overnight for us tomorrow. This will probably be the last time Cuinn and I get a night to ourselves in a long time, and we are so at ease knowing that Aislynn will be loved and well looked after at the N's house.

14. Our friends M and M who have included us in their wedding guest list! I am so excited to go to a wedding with Cuinn where I am not sick!! The last two we went to together I was really sick and had a hard time enjoying myself fully. This time though, we're gonna tear up the dance floor!

15. Aislynn's vocabulary is exploding. I LOVE hearing the sentences that she comes up with. She is so funny and smart. I love listening to her babble and I love that I can finally understand most of it. 

16. When Aislynn comes over and kisses the baby and rubs my tummy and says, "Hi baby. Nice baby. See you soon!"

17. That I only have about a month left to go until we get to meet this new babe. I'm 37 weeks now, so technically full term. Aislynn was two weeks late though, so who knows. 

18. It took me an hour to do this post with all the Aislynn distractions. And I wouldn't have it any other way.

19. Aislynn is so polite. She almost always says please and always says thank you. That is so important to Cuinn and I and it's so rewarding hearing her say those words. 

20. Hugs in the kitchen with Cuinn. That's one of my favorite part of the day.

Wednesday, 20 March 2013

A Feeling...

You know those songs that make you feel. Like... feel a lot. Those songs that come on that you almost need to pull over to the side of the road when you're driving. Just so you can sit and listen and not worry about crashing the car or something silly like that?

Yeah, I love those songs.

Mumford & Sons has a lot of these songs for me. In fact, pretty much all their songs do this to me. Cuinn and I just picked up their most recent album for the car. Aislynn even loves them, as soon as this song comes on, she sways and hums and her eyes are half closed. To be honest, she looks a little high.... which is hilarious.

I also love that they are featured in the only Disney movie of Aislynn's that I don't mind watching over and over and over again. Brave

Anyway, I really needed to share this song with you, as it has been on repeat in my car for a while. I don't like the video so much. I would rather the music video, but I am kind of a newb at YouTube. I can never find exactly what I want. SO just pretend it's not just the lyrics and just listen to the song.

At 3:30, that's when I get chills. I close my eyes, and just let the music envelop me.

Sorry, I'm also not clear on how to put the actual video on my blog. I told you, I'm kind of a YouTube newb.


Thursday, 7 March 2013

A Moment In Time...

This little girl, my little angel, is turning 2 this Saturday.

For 2 years (and nearly 10 months), I have loved this little girl. I have worried for her. I have watched her grow. I have been so proud. I have been so frustrated. I have seen so much of me in her and so much of her daddy too. I have seen her big personality shine through.

Cuinn and I prayed for her before she was created. We longed to be parents. There were many tears shed by me because I wanted her so badly. God knew what he was doing though. Giving us a little lesson in patience, knowing that we would need a healthy dose of it when we became parents. 

Aislynn is so loving. She is funny. She is smart. She is fiesty. She is independant. She is beautiful. She loves to tell us what she sees. She loves to watch Cuinn and I while we have a conversation and get right in the middle of a hug so she can be included too. She goes to bed with 6 different dollies and stuffies and mummy and daddy need to kiss and hug each and every one good night. She likes to cuddle right before she goes to sleep and loves to hear about the things we did that day. 

She loves her friends fiercly, and says hello to them when we drive past their homes. She loves to make new friends, especially little babies. When she sees a baby on it's tummy, she gets right down on the floor and says, "hi baby!" and gives it a hug. She is going to be such an amazing big sister.

She eats more than anyone else in this house. Well, maybe not more than daddy. She likes to help daddy make pancakes. She likes to stir the pot when mummy is cooking. She knows that the oven is hot and warns us not to touch it. 

Aislynn like to read books with mummy and sometimes we go through 6 books in one sitting! Her favorite book is a Curious George pop up book. She loves to play with dinosaurs and makes the RAWR noise that they make. She loves it when daddy turns the music on and dances with her. She even likes to "head bang" to daddy's favorite type of music. 

Aislynn always says, "My daddy!" and "My mummy!" She even sometimes calls us Cuinn and Sarah. She kisses my belly and says, "My baby." She claims us. Just as we claim her. She is a child so full of love and joy and emotion. Sometimes those emotions come right out of her eyes because they are really hard to deal with. Aislynn loves to be with people, but she also really values her own space and sometimes just needs to be by herself. She likes to sit in the bathroom cupboard with the door closed to have a little think. Or sit on the window ledge and watch the cars and trucks go by. But she always makes sure that "my mumma" is still near enough to come if she needs me.

Aislynn is such a joy to Cuinn and I. Motherhood is not at all what I was expecting. It is so much more. I love the little person that she is and I am honored to be her mummy.

Happy birthday, my darling girl. You are special. You are precious. You are loved.

Sunday, 3 March 2013

A thing or two a bestie would know...

One of my all time fav blogs is doing a sort of link up. She made up this kinda post a while ago, and decided to add to it. Since I am one of those "I like to read your diary" types, this kinda post excites me. So here's to all you other nosey nelly's. 

What you should know if we're going to be best friends...

I hate cleaning myself. I don't enjoy a warm shower or a hot bath. Showering and bathing is such a chore to me that I only do it once every couple (sometimes few) days. No one has ever complained about me being stinky though, so whateves.

I think jeans are more comfortable than sweats.

I'm also not allowed to leave the house in sweats. It's a legitamite house rule. When I put Aislynn in track pants or sweats, I feel like a rebel. Sweats/pajama pants/"yoga pants" are for lazing around the house.

I think "yoga pants" are ridiculous. And you are ridiculous for wearing them to Walmart.

Tomorrow is pj day at my mummy group, I am, for real, having anxiety over leaving my house in pajamas. 

I put vinegar on everything. Ev. Er. Y. Thing. In fact, when we go to the states, I have to bring my own vinegar bottle because I know that even in McDonalds if you ask for vinegar they look at you like you just asked for rat poison.

I don't believe in cry it out and I'm not ashamed that we still occasionally cuddle Aislynn to sleep.

I also love that we have a family bed.

I can't make breaky. Not even eggs. And I usually burn toast. I have been craving bacon and eggs and pancakes for the last week, but Cuinn has been so busy with work and school that he hasn't really been home for dinner, so I haven't gotten it yet. If I don't get it soon, Aislynn and I are going to breaky for dinner this week.

I don't iron clothing. If Cuinn needs something ironed, I tell him to hang it up in the bathroom during his shower. It works just as well.

I am an aggressive driver. As in, one of those drivers people look at and think, "She probably just needs to poop really badly, that's why she's driving like that."

Unless Aislynn is in the car. Then I am the kind of driver that people look at and think, "Why is she being so cautious? She must be 94."

Although being a mum is so rewarding, and I love being able to stay at home with my kid (soon to be kids), I find it kinda boring sometimes. 

That whole nesting thing that other pregnant mums feel? Yeah, I don't get that. I feel the want to want to nest, if that makes sense. But I have no desire to scrub the entire apartment clean, do up a new nursery, cook meals that will last us for the first 6 months of having a new baby. I know those things are important, and I should be doing them, but I'd rather be sleeping.

My family is most important to me. But my relationships with my friends is a very close second. If I had to choose between never eating again, and never having a friend again. I would choose never eating again.

I put Worcestershire sauce on my KD. It's amazing. I also can't eat it with a fork. It has to be a spoon.

I never finish my meals at restaurants and I always have to get it to go. Cuinn and I always have the same exact conversation:
Cuinn: Sarah, are you really going to eat it for lunch tomorrow?
Sarah: YES Cuinn. Stop hassling me.

Then I never eat the leftovers. 

Unless it's East Side Marios. I always eat my pasta left overs.

I still think Ceasar Salad is a healthy option.

I don't wash my face. Ever. I am constantly asked what facial scrubs/washes/products I use and I always lie and just say whatever product comes to mind. The truth is, I never wash my face. Not even in the shower. I figure, the water hits my face and shampoo always gets in my eyes which are on my face, that's good enough for me!

I can't stand sticky hands. If Aislynn has sticky hands and tries to touch me I tell her, "Don't touch mumma! Gross, wipe your hands please!" It's so bad that Aislynn is also anal about washing her hands after she eats or plays with something messy.

BUT, I couldn't care less if she has a booger nose. I also don't care if she wipes it on her sleeve. I'd rather she used a kleenex, but in the grand scheme of things? A little bit of boogers is not gonna hurt her. (I also don't care if she eats the occasional handful of dirt. I am not a germaphobic type of mum. And I know it annoys one of my friends to no end.)

I'm dreading my midlife crisis. In fact, I think my midlife crisis will happen sooner and be much worse than Cuinn's. 

I am too impatient for cable. I can't stand only being able to watch tv shows once a week. I would much rather wait until the whole series ends, and then buying all the dvds and watching them in one week. I'm waiting until 2014 to start watching How I Met Your Mother, because that's when the show ends. Walking Dead has been the first show in a very long time that I have watched while it's currently on the air. And it really annoys me when I can't keep watching. 

Every time I see Niagara Falls, I get choked up. Then when I walk Clifton Hill, I get annoyed. Stupid humans.

I still can't believe that my tiny little baby turns 2 this Saturday. How is it possible that I feel like I've been a mother forever but at the same time, feel like it was only yesterday that I was walking the halls of our old apartment building trying to start labor so I could meet her? Surreal. 

What do you think I should know about you if we're going to be besties?

Tuesday, 26 February 2013

An inspiration hit...

Yeah right...

I have been feeling a major lack in inspiration lately. No crafting ideas. No interested dinner ideas. No baking ideas. No blog ideas. Hence me being gone for so long. My made up songs have even become pretty boring. Take for example the song I sang Aislynn today while we got dressed:

I'm putting on your pants.
I'm putting on your shirt.
I forgot to change your diaper.
I am taking off your pants again.
I see daddy already changed your diaper.
I'm putting on your pants again.

See? How lame is that? Usually my songs are filled with hilarity and Cuinn laughs and Aislynn laughs and we all have a fantastic time.


What do you guys do when you are feeling a lack of creativity? How do you get your mojo back?

Since I've been gone for a hundred years, I figured it was time to update you all (not to be confused with y'all. I may live in the sticks, but I ain't no country bunkin). Our life is so crazy filled with stuff that when I sit down and actually think about what's going on it freaks me out. So I stop sitting and I do something to distract myself from my huge to do list.


Here's what's going on in the Simpson home. Just in case you were wondering. Which you were. I'm sure.

Cuinn is now taking a night class! He is upgrading his Chemistry to go back to school to do the same thing he's already done. (Don't get me started. Except to say, don't move from province to province. The hassle is not worth it.) He is now gone Tuesday and Thursday nights, so Aislynn and I get a little mummy/daughter quiet time. Then when Aislynn goes to bed, I get the WHOLE PLACE TO MYSELF!!! I can watch whatever I want on tv without Cuinn's hilarious commentary on how girly my shows are. I can eat candy slowly without worrying about Cuinn not really sharing and eating all of it. I can use the computer without feeling guilty about using Cuinn's computer. It's pretty awesome. For someone who has never lived alone, I kinda like that hour every Tuesday and Thursday that I can pretend I live on my own. 

But I do really love it when he comes home. Because I miss his tv commentary, and his gorging on candy habits.

My belly is growing at an alarming rate. Seriously. I'm huge. But that's a good thing. I had to go to the hospital last Tuesday for some cramping/contractions. Everything is fine with baby though. I'm not going to go into too many details, mainly because it stresses me out and the midwives keep warning me that if my stress level doesn't decrease exponentially then they will put me on bed rest. My blood pressure was even high in the hospital. Which, for me, is very weird. My blood pressure is usually amazing. Like, for real. My family dr always praises me for such good blood pressure. SO when it was higher than usual, the midwife took it again just to be sure. Anyway. Baby is fine. He/She is cooking away, and we'll meet baby in 6-8 weeks. (I'm 34 weeks, in case you couldn't do the math)

We're moving. Our apartment building just keeps getting worse and worse. When we moved in, the only problem we had here was the across the hall neighbor who was getting evicted anyway so it wasn't an issue. Well. Now there are a plethora of other issues. Including mold, people smoking in the hallway, the upstairs neighbor listening to very loud music ALL THE TIME, our super vacuuming the hallways at 11:30 pm, our super being taken away in a cop car for drunk driving in our parking lot.... Needless to say, we're outta here. Our friends just moved into a new place recently and told us how amazing their new landlord was, and we know quite a few people who actually live in our new place, so it looks like it should be better. A little smaller, but we'll actually have storage. So I think we'll be happier. This was NOT in our plan, at all, but with the decision finally made that Cuinn is heading back to school our plans changed dramatically. But, like we've been talking about in my Thursday morning ladies group, we can't really depend too much on our own plans. God sees a much bigger picture than we do and we need to fully rely and trust that his way is the right way.

Easy to say/type. Much harder to live...

We've had a few playdates with some friends we've had since our kids were tiny babies. Oh how they're growing. 

Aislynn's birthday is in 12 DAYS! My baby is going to be 2! And this year we're forgoing the big birthday bash and we're heading to a water park for a night away for her birthday. Cuinn has pretty strong feelings on kid birthdays and things, so we're going to try to stay away from them for a while and do something really special for her instead. We're really looking forward to a night away and spoiling her at her first water park!! 

I have amazing friends. Just in case you were wondering. Our very good friends the Newarks, threw me a surprise baby shower with some of our amazing friends a couple weeks ago. I may have teared up. But...we can't really be too sure since no one got it on camera. HA. Seriously though. We have made some amazing friends here, which I think I say in the majority of my blog posts and I will continue to do so until the know how much I appreciate them.

Cuinn totally decorated that chair for me. I was so impressed.

This is Aislynn's first boyfriend. These two... oh these two.

Speaking of amazing friends, one of my other friends, A, has a pretty awesome father in law. Who is spoiling her with a dinner and a limo night. And three of her friends. So guess what I'm doing Saturday night? That's right! Riding in my first every limo ride to a very fancy restaurant in a very fancy dress with some very fancy ladies!! Pretty sure it'll be fabulous. And there will be pictures.

OH, and I went to my very first NHL game! Leafs played against...uhh...someone... And I ate some really yummy sweet potato fries and had a really big drink! One of my friends has seasons tickets to the Leafs, Jays and the Ontario football team (I wanna say argo's?) so she took me to a game! It was so much fun. I'm still not a hockey fan, but I am definitely a fan of GOING to a hockey game. Much more fun in real life as opposed to watching it on tv.

Oh, and my boyfriend Phaneuf knew I was in the audience (stands?) and scored a goal as soon as I entered the building. He was totally showing off for me. Oh Dion... You crazy guy...

This is from the superbowl party we went to. Daddy was teaching Aislynn all about his favorite sport. I know he's hoping to have at least one of our kids follow in his footsteps. I feel like it may be Aislynn...

We took Aislynn to her first movie in the theater! Our tiny town's tiny movie theater put on Finding Nemo for family day and it was just a donation to get in, so we figured it was the perfect time for her to try it out. If we felt like we had to leave early, it wasn't like we wasted a bunch of money and we've already seen Nemo a bajillion times so we weren't really missing anything there either. It was a mostly hit. She sat for an hour and 15 minutes (which, as most of you know, for Aislynn is basically an eternity), and then she wasn't loud. She just wanted to watch the movie while walking up and down the aisle. Daddy got really stressed about that though, so we left. All in all though? It was a really awesome family day.

Excuse the blurry. It's hard to get a good picture IN the theater.

I really wish this one wasn't blurry. She looks so adorable.

If you are a pray-er or a good thoughts sender or whatever, could you do what you do for Cuinn's dad? He's not doing very well, health wise, and we're all just waiting on some answers. Thanks. Also, maybe do what you do for Cuinn. It's really hard to be away from your parents at the best of times, but at times like this, it's even harder. Thanks again.

So.. that's pretty much it. I hope you thoroughly enjoyed yourself as you read all about what's up in the Simpson home. I'm hoping my creativity juices start flowing again. I miss you blog.

Maybe if I finally could get my own computer fixed and I didn't have to rely on Cuinn's computer I might blog more. Hint hint, Cuinn my love.

Thanks for stopping by, friends. Much love and peace be with you.

Sunday, 3 February 2013

A Thing Or Two About Moi...

So, things have been pretty serious in the Simpson home as of late. We're dealing with changes, a friend suffered a great loss, another friend is now dealing with a different reality than expected, and its basically been a really hard month. 

Way to go, January. We used to be pals. I always feel so hopeful when you come around. Then you gotta go and be like that this year? 

I'm hoping all of the yuckiness of this year is over, since January was so full of it. (Screw you, January. Serious.)

So, since it's February and all (which is actually my worst month in recent years), I've decided it's time to just not have crappy things anymore. I'm not accepting it. February I am going to just smile. Every single day. And just pretend that life is really easy and awesome.

So, with that said, my blog post today is just going be random awesome things you never knew but probably wanted to know about me.

You're gonna love it.

1. When I'm alone in the car, I blast the music really loud and I drive as fast as I want. Which is pretty fast. Usually when I'm driving I have Aislynn in the car, so I drive safely with the music down. Or if it's just Cuinn and I, he's the one driving. But when I'm alone... I get to pretend I'm a cool young lady.

2. When asked how old I am, I almost always say 21. Even though I'm really 25. It's not because I'm ashamed of being 25, I just really think I'm 21.

3. I drive a stick shift. If you tell me you don't know how to drive standard, I laugh smugly in my head and feel superior. 

4. The number 1 name on our girl's name list right now is from a tv show. The only reason we have reservations is because we're pretty sure people will make fun of us for it. If this baby is a girl though, we'll still probably use the name.

5. When I'm watching Bro's and Hoe's. Boozers and Sluts. Brothers and Sisters, and Cuinn makes a comment like, "Justin is such a gossip." or "I can't believe how evil Holly is!" It thrills me. I love it when he loves my shows. 

6. I'm not wearing clothes at home, 80% of the time. 

7. When the phone rings, I panic. I screen all my calls and, more often than not, I just send it straight to voicemail. Leave me a message if you want me to call back. Sorry friends, but the phone gives me anxiety.

8. I really hate taking drugs. Even tylenol. When I get a headache, Cuinn tells me to take an advil or something, that also gives me anxiety. Like I'm going to become addicted to it or something. It's weird.

9. I plan my outfits for the next day in my head while trying to fall asleep. 9 times out of 10, I end up wearing something else. I am MUCH more stylish and trendy in my head, but just am not confident enough to wear those outfits in reality. Usually I just stick to my jeans and a tee. 

10. Playdoh is the worst toy in the world. Because I can not STAND IT when the colors mix. Aislynn is ONLY allowed to play with one color at a time and when she wants a new color, she has to pick up ALL the tiny specks of the first color before I get her a new one. I will throw playdoh out if there is any color mixing. Playdoh segregation is an issue people. Get on board.

11. Before I had kids I would judge you if your kid was boistorous. Get it together. Now.... I totally understand that some kids are just insane. And I kinda love it when I see other children being crazy because I can see how much more fun they are. I wouldn't trade my Aislynn for anything. Although, I would love to bottle some of that energy.

12. I'm pretty sure I'm a communist. 

13. I hate showering. SO much. In fact, I only shower every other day, sometimes every third day. Yep. I'm a dirty communist.

14. I loathe being touched. It's not a germy germ thing, it's an "I'm super awkward and don't know how to respond so it's better for everyone if we just don't touch" kinda thing. I'm also kinda crap at the emotional support thing. I'm really good at making you laugh to feel better thing though! And I'm a really good listener and head nodder...

15. Summer vacation used to stress me out in high school. Because I was a social butterfly I never really had a best friend, just kinda went from group to group, so I never had a specific group to hang out with outside of school time. I only went to school to hang out with people and go to the occasional class. So with summer coming, and no school to see people, I would get really stressed and kinda lonely in the summer. I still have summer time. I get seasonal affective disorder in summer. I'm a freak.

16. I would rather eat a big ol' bag of chips than eat ice cream or chocolate. 

17. Unless I'm pregnant. Then I only want skor, cheesecake blizzard from DQ.

18. I am so much more terrified of the known rather than the unknown. I'm ok taking a leap of faith, not knowing what's going to happen. But when I know the kind of outcomes that could happen, I can't handle it. Which is why I am so much more terrified this pregnancy than I was with Aislynn.

19. If Cuinn falls asleep before me, it takes me a lot longer to get to sleep. I feel so much more relaxed and comfortable when he's awake. Which is why I try to fall asleep on the couch while we're watching tv before bed.

20. I want to be like Aislynn when I grow up. I'm so in awe of her and think she's a really cool kid.

Oh. And none of these pictures have anything to do with the post. I just hate a blog post without pictures. 

Tuesday, 29 January 2013

A Post To Remember...

My heart has been heavy the last 10 days. 

When Aislynn was just a wee baby, we used to go to a mommy group called, "New Parents Group."

Some of our closest friends were people we met in this group.

We would share our troubles, our joys, the milestones, the new teeth, the sleepless nights, breastfeeding woes, labor recovery horror stories. We shared some pretty intimate details with one another and thus became pretty tight.

We forged this bond that is pretty unbreakable We were going through the trenches of newborn madness together. 

Then, when our babies started turning 1, we "lost" a few of our members. Back to work they went. But we still kept in contact regularly. Though, not as regularly as we should have maybe. We would get together for playdates every once in a while, and the working super moms would tell us stay at home moms how lucky we were to be with our kids all day, while we stay at home super moms would be a little jealous of the adult conversation the working moms got every day. (Grass is always greener)

One of our friends has suffered a tragic loss this last week.

She now knows the grief that no mom should ever have to feel.

Our group is now missing one of our tiny members, and we all feel this loss. 

It's so hard to find the right words of comfort for our dear friend. So we do what we can by sending flowers, dinners, messages of encouragement, hugs. 

We're gathering tonight in support at the visitation and tomorrow we will celebrate his glorious life which was cut too short.

We'll remember his infectious smile. His hilarious giggle. His big blue eyes. His curly, blonde hair. 

We'll remember how he made his parents over the moon with happiness.

We'll remember how he played with our children.

There is a hole in our group, which can never be refilled and will never be forgotten.

We are all here, standing behind you, friend. In any way we can.

May you rest in peace, sweet little one.